Daily thoughts about you

I just wish we could start over sometimes… talk about what happened.. clear it up once and for all like adults… theres something about you Amelia, about your energy, about who you are to me… a conflict happened between us, and now that we are gone our seperate ways, im doing great! Im actually glowing up, working out, eating again… im hoping ur going good too. Its just too bad that.. what happened was what was needed for this glow up to happen… i still feel horrible about it but you need to know that i would have never hurt u on purpose… yes it was foolish of me to not ask again, or even realise what was going on… i was completely out of tune with myself, with you and everything around me… i wasnt paying attention, and it led to something horrible… but you know what? I’ve made peace with my demons, i’m focussing on all the good in myself to be a better person, the person i want to be… of course they still exist, and i still live with it everyday, but instead of letting it take me down, im using it to push myself back up and higher than i’ve ever been. Because there is no fucking way in hell, that i will be going through something like that ever again. Infact i’ve even given up sex, i’ve been focussing more on money and respect, and of course my health. Almost quit nicotine, i barely smoke weed anymore, completely off every other hard drug… i’m finally doing it Amelia… i’m just sad i cant share these amazing moments with you… maybe one day we will. Maybe we wont. All i’m wishing for, is ur happiness and to achieve my goals of having my own place, my dog… a nice car… only missing that bonus i guess🤷🏻‍♂️anyways this was me missing u late at night… theres not one day that goes by where i dont think of you… every day, i basically pray for ur safety… if you ever need anything, even tho ik u dont rlly care abt my help anymore, i’m still here for you and always will be. have yourself a great night bc i can feel ur still awake, or maybe abt to sleep🤷🏻‍♂️ keep pushing and you’ll achieve great things. Be safe my little racoon, i still have ur back, even if i’m not with you! Sweet dreams.

If u see this, dont give up u got this. Ur stronger than me. So come on:) ik u hate me, but that doesnt mean i hate you… u got this… i never meant to hurt you and you know that… i was stupid and should have asked… it was just dumb… anyways stay strong be the best version of u

I just want the best for you. Stay safe Amelia. I miss you, ur always gonna be irreplaceable:) good night, also dont get mad cause i got u ps+… i felt u were hurting, thats why i left u a message. And i got u that so u can keep gaming atleast not to be bored or sad. Told u i always had your back. Take care. Also, i know its hard, but dont give up, u cant die till that ps+ is done. I hope everything is alright cause know i know. Sweet dreams. Take care.

The bad news from yesterday was maybe just a prank but i really hope it wasnt you cause or else we are gonna have a problem, and we wont have a choice but to talk:/ and i dont want that, so if it was you please say so now, if it wasnt it means its okay, and that if u see this lol

Today hasnt been good… im lost im super lost … i just … i need a break… from everyone…

I broke my bong today… my first one… sucks cause it was my first one:/ so im lowkey sad😂but its okay cause it was just a bong, its just that i wasnt really planning on breaking it (it broke as i was cleaning the fuckkkk out of it, it was almost 100% clean) anyways… just writting my feelings lol.. had to let it out ❤️good night

Hey, so i just ran through old pics of us.. and a tiktok u made… and boy… oof… i stopped it before crying lol.. i also… wanted to tell you to keep pushing, and dont give up.. you’re strong, you’re beautiful and you are the most amazing person i know. i miss you like crazy ! @#$& hope you had a good day

Love you, -B