You’re on my mind

I just wish we could start over sometimes… talk about what happened.. clear it up once and for all like adults… theres something about you Amelia, about your energy, about who you are to me… a conflict happened between us, and now that we are gone our seperate ways, im doing great! Im actually glowing up, working out, eating again… im hoping ur going good too. Its just too bad that.. what happened was what was needed for this glow up to happen… i still feel horrible about it but you need to know that i would have never hurt u on purpose… yes it was foolish of me to not ask again, or even realise what was going on… i was completely out of tune with myself, with you and everything around me… i wasnt paying attention, and it led to something horrible… but you know what? I’ve made peace with my demons, i’m focussing on all the good in myself to be a better person, the person i want to be… of course they still exist, and i still live with it everyday, but instead of letting it take me down, im using it to push myself back up and higher than i’ve ever been. Because there is no fucking way in hell, that i will be going through something like that ever again. Infact i’ve even given up sex, i’ve been focussing more on money and respect, and of course my health. Almost quit nicotine, i barely smoke weed anymore, completely off every other hard drug… i’m finally doing it Amelia… i’m just sad i cant share these amazing moments with you… maybe one day we will. Maybe we wont. All i’m wishing for, is ur happiness and to achieve my goals of having my own place, my dog… a nice car… only missing that bonus i guess🤷🏻‍♂️anyways this was me missing u late at night… theres not one day that goes by where i dont think of you… every day, i basically pray for ur safety… if you ever need anything, even tho ik u dont rlly care abt my help anymore, i’m still here for you and always will be. have yourself a great night bc i can feel ur still awake, or maybe abt to sleep🤷🏻‍♂️ keep pushing and you’ll achieve great things. Be safe my little racoon, i still have ur back, even if i’m not with you! Sweet dreams.